Inspired by a khaki combo spotted in American Apparel, our hero goes on an eco-terrorist spree through Gippsland. Pursued by the feds, he forms a secret indie band with the help of other like-minded individuals, and tours the east coast in a solar powered Tarago blowing up coal power stations with a specially modified fuzz pedal. Fame ensues … but will they stay ahead of the fuzz?
‘Hold On I’m Coming On’
After months of writers’ block and useless daydreaming, a trip to the first ATP festival in Mt Buller opens the author’s eyes to the restorative power of music combined with a state of the art lighting rig. During Spiritualized’s ‘Take Me to the Other Side’, his mind actually fuses with the earth’s tides, and subtly affects the emotions of the entire world for a short time.
‘Dan Kelly’s Dream’
A fun time apocalypse dream in 5/4 time. Geography and the elements are no match for tram-driven dream power and the world is traversed in four minutes 35 seconds. Shouts out to Schapelle Corby and Bo Selecta and thanks to Eric Burdon and Stereolab too!
‘Thinkin’ ‘Bout Alien City Blues’
Another Ray Davies-esque escape dream, but this one is packing an insane and funky space groove. Fuses the political intrigues of The Wire, the space opera of Iain M Banks and Bruce Springsteen’s ‘Atlantic City’ into an astral jam, climaxing in an alien soul club deep inside Dan’s frontal lobe.
Inspired by Jack Thompson, Dan dreams of taking two health-freak sisters to Spain after winning their hearts outside a hot-yoga class. Will they escape the dust storms in time for the holidays? Or will the cascade of Fender Jaguars bring their plane down off the coast?
‘West Coast Fishing Incident’
After settling down in the west with the surviving sister, the narrator grows old and struggles with statin-induced anxiety. He flees the city for a fishing trip to the coast. In a rustic tableaux with a menagerie of bushfire burnt, native animals, his reverie is interrupted by a boatload of Somalian refugees. Offering him guitar tips they then split the scene, leaving him to deal with the federal police and his angry wife.
‘Bindi Irwin Apocalypse Jam’
The apocalypse grows nearer as mining companies dig deeper and harder to make their stash. Nothing to do but escape to the ocean, where thankfully Bindi and Terri Irwin have established a community there with the ghost of Jimi Hendrix and a drunken Ringo Starr. Much jamming happens until the band breaks up, causing our emotional singer to throw himself into a flaming tornado after a khaki overdose.
‘I Was a Classical DJ at Dandenong Station’
This is a Stiff Records-stylee jam, where ice freaks get hopped up on the power of Stravinsky and lead a young Vic Rail employee into a glorious life of crime. If Gorecki played fuzz guitar like this, he would have lived forever. Featuring the inner-city Hawaiian stylings of the fabulous Ukeladies.
‘Gap Year Blues’
Everyone deep down wants to be Ron Wood, and it seems Dan does too. A flashback to mid-university romance and a girlfriend’s long trip to London. Written during a power blackout deep in the Latrobe Valley sometime during the epic mixing sessions for Drowning in the Fountain of Youth.
‘The Catholic Leader’
Queensland shines green and vibrant through this tale of a beautiful nun and a charismatic handy man on the run. Originally an eight-part series in the hard-hitting weekly Catholic Leader, Dan has taken this award-winning journalistic triumph and turned it into Highway 61 for the developmentally challenged. Watch for the ukulele vs metal guitar solo, inside the colosseum of cheering primary school kids.
‘Poisoned Estuary Jam’
This African-inspired epic is a meditation on the subject of responsibility. As the world slowly succumbs to sludge, a couple leave the children to the neighbours on their 20th anniversary and take a long dusk walk down to the beach of their first passion. Featuring the sublime talents of Madeleine and Memphis Kelly, and a sweet piano cameo by The Drones’ Dan Luscombe.
‘Grown Up Solutions’
The dream is over, and it’s time to get off the booze and move to the suburbs. A new direction beckons, but old habits die hard. Somewhere between Fleetwood Mac and the Maribyrnong River lies a grown up solution. After a nod to Pere Ubu, Dave and Indra get on their rhythm machines and take us all home.
I love how Dan just talks about himself in third person the whole time above. First published way back in July 2010 by Darren Levin on the long gone website Mess + Noise and I’m just re-posting some stuff I’ve dug up on my tiny blog. I guess, I might be breaking some copyright laws or something but isn’t the internet one big broken copyright law? Anyway I don’t make nothing from my little blog and maybe if I intro just some people or one to Dan Kelly’s music that’s cool! He’s got four albums under his own name and this is his third one which once again I do totally love it. He’s nephew to much more well-known and loved Aussie singer-songwriter Paul Kelly but Dan plays in his uncle’s band, you know?
Love to hear from you, if you dig Dan Kelly?